Tag Archives: chatting at the sky

#31Days: Day Sixteen (or, the day I stop doing these things)

Don’t panic at the title. “These things” refers to the list I’m about to throw at you, not writing my online diary for you all to read. I’ll continue blogging of course. You’re welcome.

But I was thinking today how I wish people would stop complaining about things they can fix. Then I realized wait, I am one of those people…but I don’t want to be that person. You know the person I’m talking about – all of us have a “that” person. Yours may be different than mine, but for me that person is someone who is so painfully unaware of themselves and the world they just go through life thinking there is nothing to be done about it, nothing actionable to do except complain. Bleh.

So, in what turned out to be a very introspective morning, I considered the qualities I currently take on and actions I repeat which I would rather not have associated with me. Guess what, there’s more than one. SURPRISE.

I want to stop…

  • rigidly sticking to my scheduled week, rather than considering changing plans for a fun spontaneous ask
  • joining in when people complain in order to feel accepted (when I actually don’t feel completely the same)
  • saying “just” when explaining anything I do
  • quickly telling people what I can’t do (no, I can’t sing; no, I’m terrible at cutting straight lines; no, I’m bad with numbers)
  • having entire fake conversations in my head with the people who make fun of me for writing this blog (to be clear, those people may not even exist in real life, but they damn sure do in my head right before I hit ‘publish’ everyday)
  • being angry at others drivers on the road
  • assuming nobody else has the same (or worse) workload, stress or bad days
  • saying yes to everything because I don’t want to let anyone down
  • giving anyone a reason to think any articles about my “terrible” generation are filled with truth
  • not having faith in a plan far greater than any I can imagine
  • missing the good parts, even on a bad day

So…turns out I have a lot of things lining up to bring me down to the status I don’t want. Step one to solving any problem is identifying the problem, right? I guess we’ll get there. What do you have on the list? Lemme know. I hate being alone in these things.

Xo,

Cb

This is the sixteenth post in a series, 31 Days of 6 a.m. To see a list of all posts from the month of October, click here. If you would like to have these posts delivered directly to you, enter your email address in the form located at the top right of the home page.

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June Things

Hello, happy almost July!

June was busy, fun and a change. I spent my first full month in my new apartment, attempted to eat mostly paleo and failed and took a few roadtrips to celebrate friends and family. Because this is my blog I obviously think any thoughts I have I need to share with you. Here are a few things I thought in June.

  • Summer means sprinkle ice cream cones every day. The first half of June I thought of sprinkles very often because we celebrated national donut day at work with Hypnotic Donuts, where naturally I had a  ‘homer’ (strawberry glaze, 1,000 sprinkles) and therefore craved sprinkles the remainder of the month. My only satisfaction came with this beauty.

sprinks

  • Someone leads you to believe, as a teenager, your acne will go away as you age. This is entirely false, 100 percent untrue. I have the worst face and I’m mid-20’s. True story I get carded at rated-R movies
  • The same person who lies to you about your teenage acne is the same person who lies to you about your teenage friends and how it’s a phase for people to hurt your feelings. Sometimes, no one grows up and you still do not get invited to Ashley’s slumber party when everyone else does and you are all twenty five so it shouldn’t matter but it does.
  • I discovered I pay (paid) nearly $140 a month for cable and internet. And then I thought, WAIT I AM POOR. So I remedied the situation by switching to AT&T, where surely my bill will always be incorrect and my costs will hike tremendously next June when my contract ends. Take that, cable bill.
  • On the same note, I lived in my apartment four weeks before watching Netflix which is a sentence meant to tell you I was incredibly busy in June and worked a lot.
  • Speaking of work, there have been a number of days in June where I feel schooled when I get home. I reflect on the day and realized I learned at least 347 new things, from different people. Sometimes I am in awe of the brain power surrounding me at this job. Then my brain turns to mush as I cook a quasi-paleo meal and perhaps drink wine. It’s all about balance.
  • There are many days where many things need to happen and there are some days you do not put on shoes and you spend time laying on the grass staring at clouds. Make sure you do both of those days regularly.
  • My schedule was pretty packed in June and remains this way through September. One weekend I drove out to the lakehouse to meet my family and it rained – and I took three naps in one day and did not wear pants (I mean, I had on a bathing suit) and ate a lot of queso. My dog barked at 1,000 duckies. My soul felt better. I thought how important margin is in your life in order for your soul to breathe.

Jackson Lake

  • I cannot stop scrolling through Rich Kids of Instagram. I want to interview these children and make a mashup of ridiculous thoughts they have in their tiny expensive brains.
  • Since I’m currently in my 20’s, it is fun for me to read about others in their twenties. Mostly when they mess up and find a way to figure out the humor in it all….which is why I love Paul and his new book “101 Secrets for Life in Your Twenties.” Even if you’re a bit past your 20’s, Paul was some wit and humor in there anyone could benefit from digesting. Need an example? Here is one of my favorite ‘secrets’: “Obsessive Comparison Disorder is the smallpox of our generation. Nine out of 10 doctors agree this disorder is the leading cause to eating two boxes of Girl Scout cookies while watching The Bachelor.” #guilty.

Liked my June things? Head over to Emily’s link-up and read a lot of lessons learned in June.

As for me, I’m going to Hawaii.

Talk soon,

XO
CB

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the letter to 17 year old Chelsie

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Hey Chels,

I’m writing to you from not too far ahead, but far enough to know a few things. Far enough to know better but somehow still know a little less.

I wish I could tell you to take a breath. I’m constantly telling myself that now but I don’t think I learned that lesson until approximately three years after I needed to. You do not actually have to do all the activities, events, lessons, extra credits, clubs or offices that are available. People will like you anyway. You won’t learn this until close to the year 2012, but hold on, I promise you do get there.

You are going to love more boys than the boy you love right now. (Here, this is a good time to practice that deep breath we discussed.) I know you’re panicking. I know you think that love is not real if it goes away. I know you think that you must be everything or nothing. The world is not black and white, Chelsie, and love lost was still love. You will doubt, in the coming years, what it means to be truly loved back but the glorious thing of it is that you will always know how to love. You are a giver. I know you think this a curse (and I may still some days as well), but know that you will one day get it all back tenfold.

You will find someone who says I love you and honestly, truly, long conversations, bad jokes, constant questions, across 300 miles loves you. I won’t tell you when or who because I can’t ruin every surprise.

You do win the arguments with your dad, eventually. You do move out of state to college, you do make a 4.0 your second semester and you also begin to find yourself along the way. You will fight when you come home, your whole family will. You will think there is something wrong with you, that you think you know too much and you are too bossy. You are wrong. You are very, very wrong and right now I wish I could hug you and tell you that you are made this way for a fierce, beautiful and amazing reason.

More than fighting your dad, you are going to fight big battles. Battles far bigger than your small self can handle alone. Start praying more, now. Please start talking to Jesus and telling him what you love in addition to what you hate. Start saying thanks, not just help. You’ll figure this out in 2011, with a year long gratitude journal, but grace comes from thankfulness.

And there’s that word. Grace. Your #1 goal, your aspiration, your frenemy. Funny enough, I know that you currently think you are very far away from Grace, and in the coming years you will definitely feel yourself slipping further and further from being filled with Grace as you desire — but I (older and wiser, as usual) see this a little differently. Hindsight is 20/20 I guess, but the truth is you are much more graceful than you give yourself credit.

Please give yourself more credit. Please calm down. Your life is so good, Chelsie. You make good friends, you make amazing choices and you make bad choices. You also make some bad friends. But you will live. Oh! I know you’re worried because Audrey has decided not to go away to college, too. Don’t sweat it. She never leaves you and you never leave her. You won’t live in the same city again for many years, but you won’t ever feel like that. You will also have to give a speech at her wedding (in two weeks) – start practicing now because I’m currently panicked.

Be nice to your family. Don’t go to that party in April 2007. Or go, but make sure you email your grandmother back first. She’ll be gone after that night and you’ll email her with no return for awhile. Don’t be mean to Natalie. She’s just a little baby tween right now, and soon she will be 17 (and you will cry at every dance recital) and she won’t think about you the way she does now. Let her be her age. You always try to make her grow up.

Keep writing, keep reading. Embrace who you are. Like I said before (worth repeating) people will like you. And they do.

You do a good job, kid. You’re going to have fun.

Xo,

Chelsie

PS: your sophomore year of college, you will want to get bangs like Reese Witherspoon. DO NOT DO THAT.

PPS: you do turn into your mother. you’ll thank her for it. you will also think your dad is actually funny. (I know, I know but you will.)

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The inspiration from this letter came from Emily at Chatting at the Sky. Emily’s new book Graceful came out this month and she’s asked her readers to write a letter to their high school selves in tribute. I bought this book for sister’s senior year of school present and I highly recommend it for any young girl (or you, if you’re a girl).

 

What would you tell yourself? Leave a comment and let me know.

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